New Day! Maps Ahead

New Day, coffee's on, back is better, breathing good (or is it well - damn thing about words - they can be such a pain in the back all on their own)

Well what shall my topic be this morning. Maps. Old maps. East, west, north, and south! Streets, neighborhoods, landmarks, and me lost!

I admit I have a few good talents but map reading and geography are not among them. I have what is dubbed "directional dyslexia" in other words when I look at a map or directions, everything is mixed up in my mind. North is South. East is West. Streets in my head are located in the wrong part of town. I have always had my left and right reversed.

I can remember an early, early memory of mine. I was about three, I think or four. I was standing in some nursery school or bible study class or something like that. My arms were straight out. a young lady was kneeling down in front of me. I wiggled one arm and said LEFT. She said right. but I think she meant correct. So I said Right. She shook her head. We then finally agreed on the left hand and the right hand. But then, I had to go and turn around. So imagine, when I faced her my left hand was wiggling and I said left, then I turn around and I tried and tried to make her understand that now my right hand was LEFT because that was the left side of the room before I turned around. I could not understand that it was my hand that was important, not the side of the room. She got mad after awhile and gave up.

Even to this day, I do not know my left from my right. I sometimes make a letter L with my pointer finger and thumb and if it looks like the correct Letter L then that is my left. But funny, everytime I go to make the letter L I use my left hand. Strange I know. But you can imagine me giving directions; it does not help to write it down. I will always tell people to turn left when I mean right and vice versa.

I believe a doctor once told me it was a brain defect. Egad. I am not perfect! lol. He said it had to do with some little connectors being crossed in my gray matter. So I will always struggle with maps and directions. I once told my father to turn left at a light and he did not need to wait for a green one - so he turned left and I was speaking loudly - not this way dad! the other left. The light was a turn right on red when clear. Lucky we did not get hit. I can,however, read a map from the passenger seat in a car (and only if the passenger seat is on the right side!). I can figure out how far we have left on this 900 mile trip. I can find alternate routes, in fact, I find everything about maps interesting and exciting when I am sitting in the front passenger seat of a car. I have been known to take maps to my car to make sense of them. I am admitting all my secrets with this blob. sorry, blog. lol

I took ballet and tap as a child. I bet you can guess where this is going, well, perhaps not. Anyway, there were ten of us and we were backstage for our ballet show and it was our turn. I was to line up at the end of the line on the right side - our group was split in two with half coming on stage from the left and the other from the right. Yep, I was on the wrong side of the stage. I slipped in with the five girls and once on stage just twirled my way into the correct spot. lol I had my tiny solo right then. My ballet teacher was none to happy. But unlike the other girls, my mom did not attend the recitals. She hated dance of any kind. She preferred to watch my brothers play baseball. So I went alone. I dressed alone. and I found the wrong side of the stage alone. I was always disturbed by my mom's absence. but my dad was absent too and that somehow did not bother me. I think it was the other girls' moms were backstage, fretting over them, fixing their tutus, hair and offering them encouragement. I, on the other hand, did my own. It was not until the sixth grade and the whole secret club stuff did I understand that my mom had prepared me (unknowingly) to be independent. To stand alone and not be scared. To face anything.

I have been independent ever since. I have not disliked living alone (now that my sons are grown), in fact I prefer it. I can call my left hand my right one and no one is there to care. lol

So, back to the maps. I am trying to figure out the early London map. Whew. where is that bottle of scotch. I am going to need it. I do not wish to have my readers wind up in the Thames when I am trying to get them to Vauxhall Gardens or somewhere.

So today is map reading, practicing my left and right mantras, marking the top of the monitor with a NORTH (but pray I do not somehow turn the map 1/4 clockwise on the screen or else East will be NOrth. Or I might put some river to the north of London instead of the south (or is it west?)

For my readers I will work hard at this map reading but in the end I will trust Heather to point out my mistakes.

gayle